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July 15, 2011

James Franco reveal the true method by which he seems to be in multiple places at once.

Actor/director/writer/poet/novelist/performance artist/compulsive scholar James Franco, best known for his work in films such as MILK, HOWL, the SPIDERMAN series and PINAPPLE EXPRESS  has admitted that a few years ago he perfected a technique for cloning humans.

Franco, 33, said in an interview with Omigodess.com that during breaks from film work a few years ago he and a handful of assistants (mostly UCLA professors) created clones of himself that would allow him to pursue multiple advanced degrees while continuing his career as an actor, artist and writer.

“These aren’t true clones per se,” said the modern Renaissance man, “but rather physical extensions of myself whose brains are essentially branches of my own, ‘base’ brain.”

Palo Alto author Franco said that there are currently seven such clones in existence and that he is in the process of creating three more.


“I can experience and remember everything that they go through. They do have a limited autonomy, but I’m still the ‘mothership,’ if you will.”

Using this squad of Francos, the Freaks And Geeks star has been able to continue working in films and pursuing his artistic interests while also attending classed toward an MFA in creative writing at Columbia University, a PhD in Literature at Yale University and taking classes in fiction writing at Brooklyn College and occasionally commuting to North Carolina to study poetry at Warren Wilson College.

In addition to this Franco recently earned an MFA in filmmaking and NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts and is slated to soon begin studying at the Rhode Island School of Design and to pursue another PhD in literature and creative writing at the University of Houston, probably in 2012.

Franco’s much-maligned performance as the co-host of the Academy Awards ceremony, in which he seemed uninspired and lethargic, was due to the fact that he had sent an untested clone to host in his stead while he studied for a final in New York.

“That was a really bad idea,” said Franco, “Franco Six is a good guy but he had not been used before audiences yet and so he was a bit glitchy. I didn’t think I had much of a choice, however, because all of the others were in use and I had that test.”  

The staggering amount and quality of education Franco has been able to pursue and obtain while still being a much sought-after Hollywood actor has been a subject of much talk around tinseltown and in New York, where the Northern California native currently resides most of the year. Many theories have been put forth as to how he was able to do it all. The most prominent theory up until Franco’s revelation was a deal with Satan.

“Clones, wow, that’s cool,” quipped Franco’s frequent co-star, actor Seth Rogen, who was unaware of his friend’s method of being in several places at once. “I’d always kind of thought it was the weed.”

Franco has a patent on the cloning process and plans to allow some Universities throughout the world to further the research, but not until 2013, after he finishes his simultaneous doctorates in Chemistry and Biology at Cambridge University in England and in Physics the University of California, Berkley.