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October 26, 2010

Adult toys have been around for awhile. Some of the earlier ones from around 2,500 years ago, when the Egyptians were at the height of their rule. So why the continuing controversy?

Why Are Adult Toys So Taboo For Most Devout Catholics And Christians?

Married couples should not feel ashamed using adult toys.Adult toys have been around for awhile. Some of the earlier ones from around 2,500 years ago, when the Egyptians were at the height of their rule. So why the continuing controversy?

You would think that as a species, we would have simply accepted their use by now. But no. We like to keep things complicated.

Unfortunately for most devout Catholics and Christians, the decision to employ “marital aids” in the bedroom can be an extremely difficult one. Plenty of moral dilemmas can arise from the misuse of these toys. These problems can include: Fetishism, Masturbation, Selfishness, and Lack of Respect for One’s Partner. -To name a few.

But if we can avoid these problems, and use adult toys to the benefit of our marriages, then where is the issue? The issue lies with the fact that at a certain point, the individual is responsible for what he/she chooses to do in the bedroom. And a lot of spiritual leaders just don’t trust us lowly masses to make the right decision.

Add to that the under-education of the everyday person on sex toy Do’s and Dont’s, and you get the kind of abiding ignorance that nothing can change, save for an honest interest in doing some independent research on the subject. In other words, this taboo is passed down from generation to generation, without anyone stopping to ask the question, “Why do we believe this?”

The Do’s and Don’ts of Adult Toys for the Morally Inclined

Talk with your priest about using sex toys in the bedroom.The Vatican has been reluctant to approach the subject of marital aids in the bedroom until fairly recently. For many Christians, there is a strong belief that the Bible speaks out against adult toys, but this could not be farther from the truth.

Catholic Married couples ARE allowed to use sex toys in foreplay. (And foreplay only.) AS LONG AS they are using them with the goal of the marital act in mind. So, as long as you ‘finish’ together, i.e. complete the union or marital act with procreation in mind, (or using natural family planning) then using sex toys during foreplay is permissible. They are NOT sinful when used in the context of marriage.

Sex toys may not be used after intercourse, or used alone for selfish sexual gratification. (Singular masturbation.)

Do: Use adult toys in foreplay only.
Do: Aim to achieve orgasm at roughly the same time.
Do: Discuss marital aids with your partner. Be clear on what, when, how, and why you wish to use marital aids.
Do: Talk to your priest or spiritual adviser if you feel that you have come across a moral dilemma.

Don’t: Use adult toys by yourself, to hurt your partner, or with someone other than your partner.
Don’t: Become attached to the toys, develop fetishes, or degrade yourself or your partner with marital aids.
Don’t: Develop a lustful attitude, and forget what the marital union is all about: Love.

Some fanatics will insist that the female orgasm is not necessary to complete the marital union. However, if the creation of new life is the goal always kept in mind, then it is imperative that both parties finish at the same time.

Some women can take between 20-30 minutes to achieve orgasm, where as the average male only takes 5-10. Now that’s a pretty big gap, don’t you think?
This is where the toys come in. The woman may use the toy to bring her closer to orgasm at the same time as her partner.

Why? Because not only is the male orgasm needed to send the sperm in the right direction, but the female orgasm is also just as vitally needed to usher that sperm into the womb.

Just take your time, always include your partner in the decision making process, and most of all have fun.

A good place to start is http://www.sextoypalace.com/

This is a website with many toys to choose from, and a lot of fun can be had simply surfing the site with your partner. Take your time, talk with your partner, talk with your spiritual adviser, and most of all trust your heart.