Dear dedicated followers of Funny Or Die News:
After reading about the Huffington Post‘s decision to move their coverage of Donald Trump’s presidential campaign from the Politics to the Entertainment section , we have been inspired to not only follow suit, but to take things a step further. From now on, all our coverage of anything Donald Trump says or does will go in the Garbage section of our website.
Let us take a step back to explain our rationale. As the dedicated News vertical of humor website Funny Or Die, we at Funny Or Die News tackle anything that the news cycle throws our way, from Brian Williams imagining getting hit by mortar fire rather than picturing his daughter’s ass getting eaten out, to hitting the streets to ask gay people when they chose to be gay.
And so it was with similar dedication and integrity that we began our coverage of the recent slurry of Trump presidential campaign news stories. But as the pile of Donald detritus began to grow, we noticed a pattern:
- Trump labels Mexico a country of rapists
- Trump doesn’t apologize for rapist comment, but rather reiterates and then sues the companies who pulled endorsement as a result
- Trump denigrates prisoners of war for their service
- Trump gave away Senator Lindsey Graham’s personal cell phone number to America because of an escalating personal feud in which they have called each other “idiot” and “jackass”
- Trump continues to sell colognes called “Success"and "Empire”
Taking a step back, these are not the actions of a politician. Most mainstream media outlets, however, cover Trump’s statements as if they were the statements of a real politician, albeit a horrible one. We do not think Trump is a horrible politician; even that is too high an honor to bestow upon him. As such, we will not put articles about Donald Trump in our Politics section.
Nor, however, are Trump’s actions even tantamount to those of a circus performer at a “sideshow,” as our friends at the Huffington Post have declared.
— The Huffington Post
“[W]e will cover his campaign as part of our Entertainment section. Our reason is simple: Trump’s campaign is a sideshow.”
We think Trump’s campaign is far worse than that. Truth be told, we staunchly believe the Huffington Post should apologize to sideshows everywhere for linking their enjoyable shenanigans to the worthless antics of Trump. As such, we will not put articles about Donald Trump in our Entertainment section.
Instead, from this point forward we will be putting articles about Trump in the section where they most belong: our Garbage section. Henceforth, articles about whatever attention-grabbing asinine comment Trump has said most recently will be featured along our other articles taking on the subject of trash, such as our real article “Here’s 17 Garbage GIFs We Found In The Trash”:
If you are interested, you can read these articles about garbage — such as Donald Trump shouting his bigoted/privileged opinion or a round-up of the best items for a raccoon to find digging through your trash — in our Garbage section here.
FOD News Editor