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April 26, 2017
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Quit being sad all the time with this helpful little list!

1. Take Deep Breaths

Make sure you really inflate those lungs. Everyone knows that we need air to live, but not everyone knows that constantly breathing is what keeps us happy and also alive. That’s why it’s very nice to have good friends who always remind you to breathe when you’re starting to feel down.

2. Keep It Positive

Think those happy thoughts. Since you’ve been too busy choosing to think about sad things, you’ve gotten depressed and thus you need to focus on more positive things. Make a conscious effort to not be depressed anymore.

3. Ignore It

If step 2 doesn’t work, try the reverse. Try embracing it all head on by thinking, “I’m not sad at all.” As we all know, depression and sadness are the same. If you’re depressed and choose not to think about it, you’ll be less depressed.

4. Consume H20

Are you hydrated? If you aren’t slightly drunk on the healing powers of H20, you won’t have the strength to overcome your overwhelming sadness. Use the power of Poseidon to vanquish the calling of the abyss.

5. Keep It To Yourself

Don’t talk about it. Depression is contagious and you wouldn’t want to be responsible for other people getting sad.

6. Buck Up, Buster

Toughen up. Odds are your depression isn’t truly a chemical imbalance and is just a product of our generation having spent too much time indoors/on phones/thinking liberal thoughts.

7. Keep On Keepin’ On

Just keep moving. It’ll fade after a while and you won’t need to adjust your lifestyle around it or make any changes to your way of life. Therapy’s a scam, medication is a hoax, and you sure as hell don’t need to assess the people you surround yourself with.

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