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September 09, 2009
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It is pretty obvious that I'm going through some changes. 

No, McPartland, I did not have any work done on my body (and I leave for LA on Saturday, btw).

Eric Appel was the first to diagnose my problem.  I was bitten by a radioactive asian bikini girl spammer.  I'm struggling to complete my sentences as I write this as I feel compelled to fire off rapid, random phrases like, "to support you" and "like what I see".

I'm going to try to use my two new superpowers for good but I'm not sure how my ability to hold a tennis racket or cut&paste at the speed of sound are going to save the world.

Why couldn't I have been bitten by Hayden Panettiere?
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