Today we started a CHANGE.ORG petition to keep Trump in the race as an Independent candidate for president. The logic is as follows:

Donald Trump is a psychopath with $4 billion, which is great for a lot of reasons. He says whatever he wants, whenever he wants, and because he is deranged and has the wherewithal to do virtually anything, one really and truly has no idea what’s going to happen next when he enters frame.

Exciting!

REMINDER: SIGN THE PETITION.

Moreover, his candidacy has held a mirror up to the fractious, completely selfish true nature of the Republican Party, as well as the endemic problems with the U.S. electoral system as a whole. Unfortunately, Trump is the unrestrained id of our avaricious, complete joke of a democratic process, which is now ruled by the corporations and individuals with the deepest pockets.

But why don’t We the People try to manipulate this stupid system in our favor by encouraging Donald Trump to run as an Independent candidate?

REMINDER: SIGN THE PETITION.

There are two, equally compelling reasons to support this:

1.) There is no way Trump will win the Republican candidacy (DON’T tell him this; he won’t believe you anyway). However, we NEED to keep him in the race for as long as possible. “Why?” you might be asking; “Why would we give this suit full of erratic, megalomaniacal ferrets any chance, no matter how slim, of being leader of the Free World?” Well, didn’t you just answer your own question? Based on the sheer entertainment value! If Trump sees this thing all the way through to November 2016, we will be treated to 16 months of complete and utter insanity; of Trump making a complete mockery of our election process, meanwhile highlighting what a circus the whole thing has become.

2.) Trump running as an Independent will siphon off more than enough votes from the Republican contender to ensure a Democratic victory. I don’t know about you, but we’d prefer to keep the whole universal healthcare-gay-marriage-more-progressive-society thing rolling and not let one of these 30-odd goons from the Republican side—who can’t even put aside their own bald self-interest to find solidarity within their party—start rolling things back to the Stone Age in service of archaic ideologies most of them don’t even actually believe in.

REMINDER: SIGN THE PETITION.

So, let’s keep Trump in there as an Independent! Look—either way, our whole system of government is basically gonna burn to the ground and the Chinese will own us soon, so let’s at least enjoy the next 1.5 years.

REMINDER: SIGN THE PETITION.

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