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August 22, 2015

Well? Why didn't you?

Why Didn’t You Go To The Bathroom BEFORE We Left?

Well, why didn’t you?
a. I didn’t have to! Now I have to.
b. I forgot.
c. I DID, MOM.

Don’t take that tone with me.
a. Sorry.
b. Sorry.
c. Ugh mom… sorry.

Well, can you hold it?
a. No, I can’t hold it.
b. MOM. I have to go NOW.
c. Only if you want me to pee in the car.

What did I say about talking to me like that?
a. Sorry.
b. Sorry.
c. Sorry.

We are very close to home, though.
a. MOM.

Fine, I said fine, okay? But these Shell station bathrooms are always so gross - you know that, right?
a. I don’t care!
b. MOM.
c. Whatever, I’ll put toilet paper on the seat. Go faster!

Listen. I am going as fast as I can. Do you want me to get pulled over by a cop?
a. No.
b. No.
c. Sure, then maybe the cop will take me to the jail bathroom.

Why are you behaving like this? Do you have a bladder problem?
a. EW.
b. No, Mom.
c. Mom, that’s so gross.

You don’t normally throw tantrums like this! Do you need to go to a doctor?
a. MOM, I’m fine.
b. Seriously, mom.
c. No, I just have to pee really badly, okay?

We’re here. Go quickly, we have to pick Katherine up from soccer soon.
b. I’ll be quick!
c. Wait can I have some money for candy? Please?

Mostly a’s: I don’t think you had to go to the bathroom before, but I think that you could have been nicer to mom.

Mostly b’s:Well, you need an attitude adjustment, missy. It’s fine that you have to go now, but you could have gone earlier and mom even reminded you to. Ball’s in mom’s court, not yours.

Mostly c’s: You should go to the doctor. If you went to the bathroom before leaving the house, there is no reason for you to throw a hissy fit like this in the car. Mom’s taking you to the doctor.