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November 17, 2017

Looking for beautiful lake-side property? Look no further than Logan Falls!

Looking for beautiful lake-side property? Look no further than Logan Falls!

Logan Falls is the perfect community for a peaceful, idyllic way of life. Every day, our field & game expert, Fisherman Harold, takes anyone who’s interested out onto the lake for an early morning commune with nature. If you’re lucky, you might even be able to snag a trout for breakfast!

If you’ve got a future Wimbledon star in your household, have no fear! Our regulation-sized tennis courts will offer hours of fun, with flawless officiating by our own Fisherman Harold, who’s traded in his bait and tackle for a lawn-chair and visor. Get ready for a good time!

After an exciting day out, head home to your gorgeous, 2-story, lakeside cabin. With full heating and air conditioning, you better believe this Shangri-La will offer you a cozy escape at any time of the year - kick back and relax! Catch the evening news on any channel with amateur newscaster Fisherman Harold, who reviews all the headlines and tells you exactly what you need to know. Ooh-la-lah!

Culture connoisseurs will be happy to know art is alive an well on the streets of Logan Falls. Our sidewalks are currently displaying a commissioned installation of statues in the likeness of one local resident, Fisherman Harold. No matter your destination, be it a community-sponsored event, the food distribution facility, or the local academy of free thought, Fisherman Harold’s smiling face will always be there to remind you you’re never alone.

When it comes to our families, safety is always a concern. Fisherman Harold knows this better than anybody. That’s why he stands atop the 30-foot perimeter wall with a shotgun every night, making sure nobody goes in or out of Logan Falls. Trespassers will be shot on sight - that is, if they’re able to avoid the search lights, barbed wire, and security cameras that cover every square inch of our beautiful neighborhood! Wave goodbye to your worries forever!

Going somewhere? We understand - sometimes the never-ending fun of Logan Falls can wear a person out! That’s why Fisherman Harold designed state-of-the-art sensory deprivation chambers, six and a half feet in length and made of concrete, where you can lie down for hours, even days, without the stressful influence of the outside world. While you decompress, staring at the motivational portrait of Fisherman Harold which is mounted on the inside of your chamber, our world-renowned catering service will serve you three meals a day through a metal slit in the wall. The chambers are perfect for anyone who feels like they need to leave the Logan Falls Compound!

Though it may seem like a vacation from a vacation, someday your family might like to visit the place outside Logan Falls. We would love to make that happen! All you have to do is refer us to any friends and family you think might be interested in coming to join us here at the Falls. As soon as a meeting is set up between your referrals and Fisherman Harold, we’ll send you on your way with a free tank of gas! You can even wave to your friends on the way out, knowing they’re going to have a blast at our weekly wine tasting.

Chances are, you’re reading this because you were referred to us by one such friend. Congratulations and welcome to your new life here in beautiful Logan Falls!