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“Hug that guy! Hug that guy until he falls!”


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“I am in disagreement with the ref again!”


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“I hate to interrupt the game, but I would like to propose marriage to sports!”


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“Ah, the good ol’ Human Puppy Bowl!”


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“I don’t care if ANY of these people are rapists!”


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“I hope there’s touchdowns. I love touchdowns!”


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“If my team loses I will be yelling at my wife and son!”


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“Sorry I’m late, I got caught up kicking some nerd’s ass!”


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“Lin-Manuel Miranda or the half-time show is garbage, am I right boys?!”


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“You know football is what they call soccer in Europe!”


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“Wow, no red carpet or anything. They really mean business!”


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“Maybe if I painted my wife to look like a football I could make love to her again!”


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