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April 14, 2008


so the current pontiff, pope benedict XVI, is visiting america (and specifically NYC) soon. all the usual suspects are out brown nosing the voice of god on earth, hoping that if they say enough right things and give enough money, they will get into heaven (also, so that pope benedict can get some more sexy, red shoes and the vatican can encrust the rest of the city in gold. seriously, have you ever been there? the place is just covered in gold, it must be in their zoning laws). also gathering in demostration are gay-rights activists and women's groups who want women priests (ok ladies, really, i'm all for equal rights, and yes, the catholic church is an archaic and sexist institution, among other things, but just let this one go. my guess is that the first female priest would get one week into the job, realize she's just become den mother to a pack of pius, repressed frat boys. all of them just waiting for an excuse to stop cooking, cleaning, ect., not to mention all the blame she would take when they all started masturbating again, and she'd quit. if you really want women in charge, there are christian faiths that allow women priests/pastors/reverands, not to mention all the non-denominational churches springing up these days, go join one of them. is being a catholic so important? do you really think god is only gonna let CATHOLICS into heaven? well, then, i have a bridge in brooklyn i'd like to sell you...). everyone protesting this pope has a valid point. unlike the previous pontiff, pope benedict seems incapable of moving into the 21st century (let alone beyond). he says hurtful things about gays, regrets the loose interpretation on the use of condoms that pope john paul II allowed in africa (john paul II wanted to do more because he understood the value of human life and how to promote religion in the modern era, but traditionalists, like pope bendict, made it difficult to effect change), plus he looks more like a glimpse into elton john's future vegas show's wardrobe than a symbol of faith and piety (also, looks like a gold plated tylenol). i think we would all be better served if we ignored him and what he stands for. just let the catholic church fade into it's self imposed irrelevance and disappear from our public consciousness. god won't go anywhere, i promise.