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October 01, 2014
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Here's how some winner animals triumphed over their extinct loser friends.

According to the World Wildlife Foundation, half of the world’s wildlife has disappeared since 1970. Nature lovers can agree: This is great news. If we’ve lost exactly half our animals, they were clearly the weakest half. The animals that remain are lean, mean, not-going-extinct machines. They’ve shed the (literally) dead weight of their wussier animal colleagues and they’re now poised to make a major comeback.

How did the survivors do it? Here’s how some of those winner animals triumphed over their extinct loser friends.


Black bears formed a union for collective bargaining.

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This fish survived by finding industrial waste delicious.

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This tiger sold his own paws to poachers. He used to have 127 paws.

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These apes survived by inventing streamable video content.

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This wolf survived by telling people she was a labradoodle who got dusty.

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Lonesome George the tortoise, the last of his species, survived for 102 years, then faked his death and went on the lam.

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This owl avoided being killed by hunters by being like “Seriously? Come on.”

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This Orca whale just put her head down, worked hard, and got a scholarship to Princeton.

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Unicorns survived by pretending to be horses (horses are long extinct).

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Rhinos survived by hiding behind the cast of Modern Family.

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Slow lorises survived by successfully building nuclear weapons.

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