OK! Here it is a day in the life of JIMBOBALOUIE!
Today was spent just about like this.
1. Crawled out of bed at 6:30 am.
2. Drove my wife to school at 7 am. Grabbed a paper at 7:20 am.
3. Came home at 7:25, woke up #2 son and struggled to get him on the school bus for 8 am. Read paper! On the bus on time! Big Success!
4. Daughter, Meghan, home from University, wakes up at 8:30 am, with a take home exam to be completed. Sets up laptop on kitchen table. Gets busy!
5. Jimbobalouie starts looking at and writing the caps, answers e-mail, sits drinking coffee in the Bat Cave. Somehow it doesn’t feel right! Things are too quiet!
6. Meghan consults with her number one tutor about every half hour. BINGO! There goes the quiet!
7. Meghan’s break at 1 pm, we return movies to store, pick up some Coke Zero and gum then return home. Round trip - 45 minutes. Somehow I’m thinking this is the only break I’ll get during the day. You know that I’m psychic! Right!
8. Meghan leaves with boyfriend on break #2. Jimbob sorts out the Christmas stuff, sets up artificial tree, throws on the lights and stacks all of the Christmas containers.
9. Throw in a load of wash.
10. Clean toilets and bathroom, sweep hardwood floors. Make the bed –things are lookin’ good! Maybe I’ll get lucky!
11. Run out to pick up the wife at school. First hit the coffee drive through at Tim’s. She’s angry, agitated – those little Grade 2’s were little pissers today. Full moon risin’ at week’s end. Hmmmmm, maybe the luck thing is dissipating! But, then again, I did bring coffee!
12. Prepare a supper of Med Chicken skewers, potato skins and string beans. Meghan writing up a storm, Sherrie still complaining! Me drinking wine by now – looking to marinate the brain! Thinking, if I didn’t have bad luck, I’d have no luck at all.
13. Josh at High School Basketball practice –expected home at 5:30 pm –no show. Damn, it’s a late practice –won’t be home until 7 pm.
14. The daughter and wife are hungry –feed them, do the dishes, clean up. Drink more wine!
15. Josh limps in a 7 , with buddy Andrew. He’s gone knee to knee with one of the big men. Knee swollen and stiff, and this is the 16 point a game captain of the team. Andrew says, “I think he’s really screwed.” Later friend and teammate, Kevin, calls –worried and says if Josh was injured seriously, “I was so upset I was gonna quit basketball.” We ice it, elevate it –it looks more like bruise! Relief comes after the 5th glass of wine –for me, that is, not Josh!
16. Meghan thinks we’re all too noisy and storms off to her room. She makes occasional visits to the Bat Cave for help. The wine helps her father give lucid instructions and suggestions. I am very intelligent under the influence. Hey, look at some of my caps!
17. Sherrie goes to bed at 9 pm, exhausted from a day with 6 and 7 year old demons from hell. Looks like Jim will be UNLUCKY tonight!
18. Meghan is getting to the anger stage with this assignment. Ka-Ka mouth abounds and apparently #1 tutor has become #1 asshole! Maybe it’s the wine and my “don’t give a shit attitude”! Hey, I am retired!
19. Josh has a hot tub, a shower, checks his mail and is off to bed.
20. I remain posted for further consultation. The empty wine bottle sits stoically on the table. Time to write some awesome caps. WTF, my caps are dying like dandelions on a freshly sprayed lawn. FN die-bombers are at it again! Time for posting the silly shit! Well, you know what I mean!
21. I remain on standby with Meghan threatening an all nighter! Hmmmm! I do have a few beers in the cooler!
22. It’s 10:32 and I wait, typing this BLOG post with my 0.08 fingers as I struggle to make sense of it all! And I’m thinking;
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23. TOMORROW’S SCHEDULE SUCKS AND NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE IS GONNA GET LUCKY!
a) Must get up at 6:15 am, shower and get prettied up!
b) Daughter must be woken, as well as the 14 year hibernating bear.
c) Wife will be delivered to work for 7:15, with daughter in tow, and son on his own to get on that damn school bus. Oh, my God, can he pull it off now that he walks around like he’s disabled! I practically have to lead the zombie around by the nose when I’m there in the morning! 50/50 chance of success!
d) We must make the 1 hour and 15 minute trip back too Meghan’s college to hand in that paper by 9 am. They’re calling for snow, freezing rain and rain! Take your pick! Damn, I can’t drink wine during this excursion! But I surely will after!
e) After the take-home exam is dropped off, we’ve got to hit the bookstore for an
X-mas gift certificate for a nephew, go to Meg’s apartment to pick up more of her stuff, then drive another half hour to the Mega Mall for Meghan and I’s annual Christmas shopping extravaganza –oh, my! This could be costly!
f) But our day does not get any easier, pray tell, because we must hustle back and pick up the wife at school early, because Josh has a basketball game at 3:30 pm –even though he might be disabled and a bench warmer! WTF!
g) Usually such an extended list ends with PRICELESS!