By now you’re probably aware, either by personal trial or the multiple articles having been written about it, that Instagram doesn’t allow ladies to show their nipples. Dudes can show their nipples. Ladies cannot show their nipples. Because lady nipples make people too horny, I guess. Never mind the fact they also provide nourishment to human babies, they’re just too goddamn provocative for the popular photo app.
There have been many attempts to circumnavigate this censorship, most amusing of which has been women photoshopping men’s nipples onto theirs, which is technically allowed by Instagram.
Other people have been a bit more playful and pasted flowers or hearts over their teets. A lot of these attempts are documented by the hastag #freethenipple. Today, someone attempted something that hadn’t been done before to further the cause. That someone was supermodel Naomi Campell and her strategy was topost a photo of herself toplessand be Naomi Campbell.
Instagram humored us all and kept the post up for a few hours before taking it down. So what’s the lesson here, ladies?
Even if you are as gorgeous and perfect as Naomi Campbell, your nips are still an egregious offense to the internet. You can post photos of all the rest of your boobies and your butt and you can use racial slurs as much as you want in your captions but please be considerate and hide your teeters, k?
Instagram thanks you.