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July 28, 2015
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Please. We just want our daughter back.

Here. I Aggregated 16 Photos of Locations You Won’t Believe Aren’t Photoshopped Just Like You Asked. Now Please Tell Us Where Our Daughter Is.

1. You would be wrong to assume that this highly unlikely photo of a rainbow is the result of photoshopping. It’s 100% real. Now please, for the love of God, tell us the location of our daughter.

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2. Though this fog effect would be easy to pull off with a Gaussian Blur filter, that’s just not the case here. This photo represents something that really occurred in nature. Now that you’ve seen it, will you please tell us where our daughter is? Her mother and I are so worried.

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3. Is this what you want? A photograph of a mountain? Will this make you return our daughter to us, you sick freak?

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4. Will this make you return her to us? A seemingly improbable photo of lightning striking a tree that is nonetheless completely real?

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5. Let me ask you something. Why 16 photos? Why not 17? Or 100? And why photos that you won’t believe aren’t photoshopped? Why not just any photos of nature? Or hotrods?

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6. In all honesty, I can’t tell whether most of these are photoshopped or not. It would have been very easy for the photographer of this photo to take a picture of Niagra Falls and then photoshop some birds in. How would I know?

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7. Anyone who’s tried their hand at photography knows that it’d be pretty tricky to balance the light levels in this photo without using photoshop. Maybe the photographer here did. Does that really matter? I just want my daughter back.

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8. What do you get out of this? Is it the photos themselves? Is it the descriptions? Would you derive whatever sick pleasure you get from this even if I didn’t describe them to you?

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9.

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10.

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11.

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12. You disgust me.

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13. I’m done playing your games.

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14. Oh god. I hope that photo of a chili pepper didn’t break our deal. Please don’t hurt my daughter! I’m so sorry.

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15. Sarah, if this psychopath is letting you read this, just know that I love you and I always will. I’ll do anything to get you home safely.

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16. Though you may think this photo of a golden cornfield sprawled beneath an azure sky is the recipient of a little photoshopping, you’d be dead wrong. This is just good old mother nature strutting her stuff.

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