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January 28, 2009


Now seriously... has anyone EVER died from humor.  Like laughing to death?  I think not.

Laughter is supposed to be the best medicine, so what's all this funny or die talk. 

This site has really got me thinking now... so here is a list of ways you can TRULY die; bite the bullet, push up daisies, swim with the fishes, meet your maker.

- fucking to death... it happens

- ham sandwich... hold the mayo please

- going to work... this guy in China was worked to death last year, I read about it on CNN

- peanut butter and jelly... some people are allergic to nuts, practice safe kissing

- being old... you can go any day now, like right now

- chewing gum... teach your kids to walk and chew gum at the same time, yeah I know tutors are expensive

- bullets... they suck, when they're traveling so fast they might get stuck in a vital organ or car door

- murder... especially if you die from it

- Listening to Hollaback Girl, Rihanna singing, or Sarah Palin ... exercise extreme caution, more deadly than a black mamba bite

- dick caught in zipper.... extremely rare, but it happens, and your life flashes in front of your eyes when you look down

- vampires.... they are most likely to bite in the month of October, goods news is that if you're attacked and blood is drawn, you'll live forever, but you'll be walking dead

- barbershop movie in the theater.... stay home, wait till it comes out on DVD and rent it, that way you'll be saved a pistol whipping and two slugs to your chest

- car accident... use a hands free devise at all times, watch the speed limit and never share the road with an asian driver (good at math, bad at parking)

- instantaneous self-combustion... it happens around 1500–1800°C, it's a fire hazard

- haircuts... strange person, holding scissors inches away from your head, chopping off hair follicles, one slip of the tongue and you're a goner

I'm sure there is more... those are a few I thought off just now