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January 06, 2017
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#6. Sweat backward.

  • People are 70% water. Eat people.
  • Sleep inside your water bed.
  • Semen, says my boyfriend.
  • Let a whale swallow you whole.
  • Sweat backward.
  • It takes gallons and gallons of water to grow one almond. Eat almonds!
  • Sit on a sprinkler.
  • Bite into a jellyfish and suck whatever comes out.
  • Let those tears roll off your check and into your mouth.
  • Put ice in every meal you eat. Lasagna plus ice: Mmm mmmm!
  • Two words: Butt. Chugging.
  • Suck a glacier’s dick.
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