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December 09, 2014
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Two Royal Families And A King Take In Some Brooklyn Basketball

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British royal couple, Kate Princess and William Future-King-Man, were exactly where I wanted to be last night: sitting courtside for the Brooklyn Nets/Cleveland Cavaliers game, taking in some hot December NBA action up close and personal. But that’s not all that was happening at the Barclays Center last night! American royal couple, Beyonce and Jay-Z, were also sitting courtside, get this: on the other side of the court! It was a veritable stand off between England and America’s #1 power couples. The excitement was palpable…will they or won’t they…meet at mid court and…kiss…or fight…or exchange pleasantries?! Here’s what actually happened:

Transcript:
William - “Hello, nice…what’s up?”
Jay-Z - “Hey there, uh-huh.”
Kate - “Hi, hey, nothing how are you?”
Beyonce - “Mmhhmm, thanks, nice to meet you too”

And then they headed back to their seats because the tall men wanted to continue playing their game. Also of note, Beyonce’s “Crazy in Love” is playing in the background there. Big time power move from Queen B.


LeBron “King” James also met the Royal couple (I’m assuming he’s hung out with Jay-Z and Beyonce before).

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Transcript:
William - “Jolly good show out there James. Brilliant. etc”
LeBron - “Should I, uh, I’ll just put my arm…is this…alright, nice.”
Kate - “OK, Kate, just fold your hands LIKE A LADY.”

James also presented the British royals with gifts! As a joke, he gave Kate an adult sized jersey and gave her husband William a small jersey with the wrong name on it to belittle him and threaten his manhood. Hey, if they wanna come to America, royalty or not, they’re gonna get a healthy dose of our humor. And here in America, we raz!

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Consider yourself raz’d, my man


Meanwhile in Los Angeles, these are the celebrity sightings happening at Lakers games:

Rambis!

It’s important here to mention that while all the Royal meet and greet was happening, players on the court were also making a huge political statement by wearing “I Can’t Breathe” shirts during their warm-ups in protest of the recent Eric Garner case.

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For all you stats-heads out there: the Cavs beat the Nets 110-88.


And finally, on a personal note, British people playing basketball has long been something I find very funny. Here’s proof from 2 years ago:

They’re great soccer players, cricket players, rugby players, etc. Even American sports like baseball and football I can picture. But there’s something about basketball that seems preposterous. And this photo from last night proves my point. William seems like a great guy, but the way he’s holding that b-ball ain’t right.

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“So now I punt this through the wickets, right?”

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