Yesterday, Gokul Venkatachalam, 14, of Chesterfield, Missouri and Vanya Shivashankar, 13, of Olathe, Kansas were crowned co-champions of the Scripps National Spelling Bee. Perhaps equally notable, however, were the judges’ unorthodox examples when contestants asked for certain words to be used in a sentence:


Word:
Nunatak: A hill or mountain completely surrounded by glacial ice.

Example Sentence:
“Hey—check out this fucking nunatak.”


Word:
Scacchite: A mineral consisting of native manganese chloride found in volcanic regions

Example Sentence:
“Scacchite is a word that only a numbnuts teenage virgin would need used in a sentence.”


Word:
Hippocrepiform: Shaped like a horseshoe.

Example Sentence:
“Not to get too into specifics, Tina, but I will tell you that his ding-a-ling was totally hippocrepiform—and his balls smelled like the dumpster behind a Vietnamese restaurant.”


Word:
Cocozelle: A variety of zucchini.

Example Sentence:
“As you can see by the x-ray, there appears to be a cocozelle jammed all the way up there.”


Word:
Zimocca: A rather harsh commercial sponge.

Example Sentence:
“I’m tellin’ ya, Tina, I can’t take another day with these kids—it’s like having your asshole scrubbed out with a zimocca.”


Word:
Nixtamal: Limed kernels of corn that is ready to be ground into masa

Example Sentence:
“Toss all that disgusting nixtamal into the garbage and let’s go get some pizza.”


Word:
Urgrund: A primal cause or ultimate cosmic principle.

Example Sentence:
“Look, just empty the bedpans and give Mrs. Werner in 608 a sponge bath, okay? Everything doesn’t always have to have some kind of urgrund to it.


Word:
Thamakau: A large outrigger canoe used in the Fiji islands

Example Sentence:
“If the thamakau is a rockin’, don’t come a knockin’! ‘Cause we fuckin’ in this large outrigger canoe used in the Fiji Islands! Ba-BOOM! Ba-BOOM-BOOM!”


Word:
Pyrrhuloxia: A cardinal-like grosbeak of the southwestern US and Mexico.

Example Sentence:
Every time we clean the goddamn bay windows, these stupid pyrrhuloxia fly right into the glass and break their necks; creeps me out, seeing all these pyrrhuloxia twitching all over the front lawn.“


Word:
Pipsissewa: Any of a genus of evergreen herbs of the wintergreen family

Example Sentence:
“Hey—check out this fucking pipsissewa.”

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