Full Credits

Stats & Data

July 08, 2011

Ground zero in the joke revolution of the last century.

imageA man named Dave was about halfway through his workday when it dawned on him that it was his wife Kate’s birthday, and that he hadn’t bought her a present yet.

Dave loved his wife and didn’t want to disappoint her, so he thought hard, trying to come up with a good idea for a gift.

Soon it dawned on him that Kate had been hinting that she’d like to have a dog someday soon. She had always had dogs growing up and was disappointed that she couldn’t keep one at their old apartment. They had only recently bought a house with a sizable yard, one that was perfect for a dog or two. Dave couldn’t think of a better way to show his love for his wife than to come home today with a dog.

After work Dave went to a nearby pet shop owned by a friend of his named Carlos.

“Carlos, Kate wants a dog,” he said, “and today is her birthday. It’s kind of sudden, but do you have a really nice, friendly and attractive dog that she might like?”

“I sure do,” said Carlos, who led Dave into the back of the store where there were a number of kennels, each containing a dog. Carlos led him all the way to the back of the room and pointed to a particular kennel.

“Take a look,” said Carlos.

Dave looked into the kennel and saw that inside was a young but grown dog with a coat that was a rich brown color. Most remarkably, Dave noticed that the dog’s coat was amazingly, fantastically, overwhelmingly shaggy.

“That’s the shaggiest dog I have ever seen,” said Dave, amazed.

“Yep,” said Carlos, “and he’s friendly, too.” Carlos opened the kennel and brought out the dog, who nuzzled against Dave and licked his hand.

“I’ll take him,” said Dave.

Half an hour later Dave’s car pulled up into the driveway of his home. Kate, who arrived home from work earlier, saw him coming and came out to greet him. When Dave opened the back door and let the dog out, Kate gasped with delight and ran to meet the new pet, who took to her immediately.

“Happy birthday, Kate,” said Dave, kissing his wife on the cheek as she hugged the dog.

“Thank you, baby,” she said. “He’s beautiful. I think he’s the shaggiest dog I’ve ever seen!”

“I know!” said Dave. “That was the first thing I noticed about him.”

image“I think he’s the shaggiest dog in the neighborhood,” said Kate. “We should show him to the Lassiters next door.”

“Let’s do that now,” said Dave.

He attached the leash he had bought on to the dog’s collar and the three of them walked next door and rang the doorbell of their next door neighbors, the Lassiters. Mr. Lassiter emerged.

“Hey Dave, Kate,” said Mr. Lassiter. “What’s going on?”

“We’d like you to meet the newest member of our family,” said Dave, who then pointed down to the dog.

Mr. Lassiter was shocked. “Wow,” he said, “That’s the shaggiest dog I’ve ever seen!”

“He certainly is shaggy,” said Kate.

“I think this is the shaggiest dog in the entire city!” said Mr. Lassiter. “We should show this dog to the mayor! I’ll call my friend at city hall tonight!”

Mr. Lassiter made the call, and his friend arranged for a meeting on the steps of city hall the next day during Dave’s Lunch break. The mayor was amazed and pleased with the dog.

“That’s the shaggiest dog I’ve ever seen!” said the mayor.

“Thank you,’ said Dave.

“Why, I think it’s the shaggiest dog in the entire state! You should bring this dog to meet the governor! I’ll arrange it right away.”

The mayor called the governor’s office and arranged a meeting for the following Saturday when the governor was in town. Dave brought the dog to the governor’s hotel and the state’s chief executive met him and the dog along with the mayor next to the hotel pool.

“That’s the shaggiest dog I’ve ever laid eyes on!” exclaimed the governor.

“He certainly is a shaggy dog,” said Dave.

“I’ll say,” said the mayor.

“This is easily the shaggiest dog in the state,” said the governor. “I think it may be the shaggiest dog in the entire country!”

“Really?” said Dave.

“Yes!” said the governor. “I think it’s time to take this dog to meet the President of the United States!”

The governor’s office made the arrangements. Two weeks later Dave, Kate, the dog, the mayor and the governor flew to Washington, D.C. and arrived via taxi at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. An aide ushered them through the White House and into the Rose Garden, where they waited for the President.

About an hour later, accompanied by the strains of “Hail to the Chief,” the President of the United States entered the Rose Garden. He shook hands with the governor, the mayor, Dave and Kate.

“So is this the dog I’ve heard so much about?” asked the President.

“Yes,” said Dave.

  The President reached down and petted the dog on the head. He looked at the dog closely.

“This is the dog that you think is so shaggy?” said the President.

“Yes,” said Dave, “Don’t you think he’s the shaggiest dog you’ve ever seen?”

“No,” said the President.