Okay guys, you know my best friend Anna’s been really bummed that her dad went out to buy almond milk and hasn’t returned to their house. It’s been hard to watch.
But thankfully, my forensic science skills from watching Law and Order instead of doing homework are being put to use! Because I just found out, Anna’s estranged dad MIGHT BE COMING BACK!
Now keep in mind, the family revival isn’t ~official~ just yet. I just ran into some guy who looked like Anna’s dad outside the Motel 6.
He was wearing a mustache but that’s obviously fake and he must be living as a literal fugitive! And he seems pretty clear: He wants to come back.
When I found Anna’s dad and asked if he missed her, he said “maybe, deep down.”
You heard me!
He wanted to know how I found him. But a detective never reveals their secrets. We never made eye contact, but that’s because HE CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH OF MY AMAZING SLEUTHING!
He seemed really uncomfortable…with my bomb ass skills! So I just gave him the face of Ice-T trying to know something.
Then I asked him again, bitch slapping him with my best Jerry Orbach impression. Is he coming home to my bestie and her mom?
And he looked to a window of the motel, where some woman was carrying a crying baby. He told me he had to go.
BUT HE DIDN’T SAY NO!!!
Still, it’s hard to know if this ~family reboot~ is really gonna happen! He seemed really busy.
But when I told Anna, she seemed ecstatic! We ran around our school parking lot screaming “he didn’t say no!” DARE TO DREAM!
This case is closed.