WENDY’S SUMMER JOBS
Job #1: Hotel Receptionist
BY: KELLY A. BROTMAN
(Reedited on 04/27/2015)
WENDY FRESHNER: A TWENTY YEAR OLD COLLEGE STUDENT. SHE IS STARTING HER SUMMER JOB. (NOT CAST YET)
FERNADO QUEZNO: A THIRTY SOMETHING WOMANIZER. HE IS THE HOTEL MANAGER. (NOT CAST YET)
GEORGE FRIEDMON AKA ERNEST HEMINGWAY: AN ESCAPED HOSPITAL PATIENT FROM THE PSYCH WARD WHO THINKS HE IS ERNEST HEMINGWAY.
NURSE: FRIEDMAN’S CARETAKER FROM THE HOSPITAL.
EXT. HOTEL PEARLMONT, LOS ANGELES, ESTABLISHING - DAY
INT. HOTEL LOBBY - DAY
(QUEZNO, WENDY )
FERNANDO QUEZNO AND WENDY FRESHNER WALK IN. THEY WALK TO THE RECEPTION DESK.
And over here is the lobby. This is where you are going to be stationed, Miss Freshner.
Thank you, Mister Quizno. for giving me this opportunity to work at such a fine establishment.
It’s Quezno. Not Quizno. I’m not a sandwich. The ‘E’ is more pronounced. Now the phone is right here, be sure to call me if there is an emergency, and only for an emergency. I am a very busy man. Now you can handle the basics such as house keeping, maintenance, and the occasional escaped mental patient...
(ALARMED) Say what? I thought this was a hotel?
(IGNORING HER) And do not under any circumstances press the emergency button, only I’m allowed to press that button.
Why can only you press that button? What if I see an emergency?
Then you check with me to see if it really is an emergency. Remember, you’re under my jurisdiction. You did sign the Medical Consent Forms right?
QUEZNO TURNS TO GO.
Well, I am done here. Now don’t call me down unless...
Unless of a real emergency.
You’re a fast learner. Good.
PEARLMONT LOBBY AN HOUR LATER.
(WENDY FRESHNER, GEORGE FRIEDMAN, NURSE )
Wendy is busy at her desk, her cell phone rings. She answers.
Hello..oh hi Mom.
(Pauses listens to her Mom)
No, Mom, no Mom! I refuse to work for you! The last time I did you made me in charge of looking after the children in the waiting room!
Because I got the chicken pox, the measles, strep throat all in a six month period! There is no way in hell that I am working for you! I know you want me to be a dentist like you but I prefer the simple life, I want to be a weather girl! I do not care if you think it is a pointless career but that is the life I choose, and I am sticking to it! And no I'm not going to be the female Ron Burgundy, goodbye Mom!
In walks George Friedman, he is in a suit. He has a bunch of flowers with him.
Hello, Mary my one true love!
He bends down and kisses her hand. Wendy hanks her hand away.
Can I help you sir?
My dear woman, I can understand the cold attitude my dear. But I must go to Paris! It is the perfect place to see the Parisians in action.
George Friedman goes to kiss her on the lips, she slaps him in the face.
Sir do not make me call the police!
Nurse Obama rushes into the scene.
Ma'am do not call the cops! I am dreadfully sorry. This is Doctor Friedman, he is suffering from dementia and he thinks he is Ernest Hemingway! He has a bad case! It is unfortunate that he was one of Los Angeles top brain surgeons when he was in practice.
(Horrified) He assaulted me!
(Sighs) No he did not, he just tried to kiss you.
(Horrified) He just tried to kiss me, without my permission, I am pretty sure that qualifies as assault.
(Seriously) Did you slap him?
I sure did!
(Relieved) That should knock him back to the present.
(Flustered) Where am I? Am I back at that Quezno place? The sandwiches there are terrible!
Yes your back at the Pearlmont.
Right, right, be sure to give them my usual donation.
Yes Doctor. Friedman, I'll be sure to give them the Subway sandwiches coupons.
Thank you, Nurse.
Nurse and George Friedman leave the scene.
(Flustered) I almost got kissed by a greasy old man, and this hotel gets Subway coupons. This at least better than getting the stomach flue on my prom night!
END OF SKETCH.