Los Angeles, California (HAHAJK) – A Los Angeles man was finally able to reach the fabled “Jenny” after 30 years of attempting to dial “867-5309” on his telephone.
Larry Johnson of Culver City tells HAHAJK that after years of futile attempts to reach her, Jenny finally picked up the phone and spoke in a gravely voice.
“Jenny, now approximately 57 years of age, says that she is just happy to talk to someone not asking for “a good time”.
“That ship sailed a long time ago,” Jenny coughed. “I have six kids, work at a grocery store and live in a trailer. I need some boob medicine for my lumps.”
Initially excited that he had found Jenny after years of searching, Johnson would be in for a surprise from his fantasy woman, who was based on the 1982 Tommy Tutone hit.
“A problem arose, because there was no area code involved,” he says. “I didn’t know where the hell she lived. I knew it was a real number because there was no 555 in the prefix.”
However, Johnson says his excitement quickly turned sour when he realized the woman he had been fantasizing about for years was now a crusty and withering shell of the woman she once was in the early 80’s.
“I feel bad that she seems like she is in a really bad place, but I am really revolted by the sound of her voice. Between the coughing and the wheezing I don’t think I will be calling her again.”
Johnson says he realizes he is no longer a “spring chicken” himself, but says that he is confident that he is at least doing better than her.
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