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November 30, 2016
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#3. He'll fake his death and let his "twin brother" take over.

President-elect Donald Trump announced he will hold a news conference with his children on December 15th to explain how he will be “leaving” his business to avoid the appearance of a conflict of interest while in office. He hasn’t given any details yet, but we have some theories.


By cheating on it with a younger, hotter business.


He’ll look in the mirror and say, “You’re Fired.”


Via 4 a.m. tweet.


By ascending up an escalator.


He’ll go out to buy milk and never come back.


Ghosting.


The same way he ran them: by going bankrupt.


He’ll fake his death and let his “twin brother” take over.


By building a wall around it.


He won’t.

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