Celebrities See All

Close

Quick Links

or
Published November 24, 2010 More Info »
3 Funny Votes
0 Die Votes
111 Views
Published November 24, 2010

the true story of Thanksgiving

A work of fiction by: Raymond J. Carrington

                A long time ago in the year 1620 a bunch of white people showed up in a ship, off the coast of North America in a place we call Plymouth Cape Cod.  Most of the 102 people stayed aboard the ship called May Flower a full year, until their slave Squanto could Russell up some more slaves known as the Wampanoag Indians to unload the boat.  Once the Wampanoag Indians taught the white people how to grow food and survive in the new environment they were delegated to second class citizens while proper black slaves were shipped in to take the jobs of the Wampanoag Indians.

                It wasn’t until the year 1789 that President George Washington declared Thanksgiving Day as a un- official holiday in celebration of the United States of America’s victory over the British Empire by which he claimed victory by killing a bunch of people in their sleep on Christmas.  However the Thanksgiving Day we know and love today didn’t really come to be until the year 1863. Then President Abraham Lincoln, at the height of the Civil War, gave into pressures from Sarah Josepha Hale (Author: Mary Had a Little Lamb.) to make Thanksgiving Day a national holiday.  Sarah Josepha Hale aka the Turkey Queen of Washington, was also known to have unspecified activities with a Slave free Turkey Farm and was also the wife of a Postal worker.

                So while you sit and enjoy your meal with your family remember how this all came to be.  Success is no accident, think about it, when you return from your holiday to your workplace be manipulative, sneaky and most of all be persistently annoying to your superiors so that they cave in to your desires.  It’s the American way!  I hope you enjoyed my slightly twisted take on Thanksgiving.

                On a completely different note: Check out if you can the work of Alan Streets. 

Advertisement
Advertisement

From Around the Web

More