Apologies it took so long to respond. It has nothing to do with our feelings for the show. We were just busy with the Billions finale cut. (Did you watch? Pretty powerful!) But you have our full attention, so let’s get down to it…
First of all, love the theme music! Spot on. So nostalgic.
After that, I guess our main note would be trying to understand the story, characters and generally what’s happening from a minute to minute basis. That might seem like a big note, but don’t freak out. We totally trust you, and the show’s built-in fan base. To get more specific:
– It’s cool to find out what all the classic characters from 1990 are up to. But, and we mean this with absolutely no offense, some of them are old and crusty now. Were there any attractive babies from the initial run we can catch up with? Maybe a conversation for casting…
– The Black Lodge scenes. In one sequence, Agent Cooper makes out with adult Laura Palmer, who then gets eaten by a curtain. A tree branch monster with a talking brain face spouts gibberish with a white horse in the distance. Then, Agent Cooper is shrunk to a miniature man and falls into an observational cube in a New York City skyscraper. I guess our question here is if this is an elaborate social experiment aimed at Hollywood and studio culture? We won’t be mad if it is! Just curious. If it isn’t, did you clear the horse with American Humane Association? We don’t want any needless lawsuits, especially after how much money we put into this exciting project!
– We think what really connected people to the show was the murder mystery of an attractive woman. Now we have a murder (good) of a semi-transient inconsequential librarian (bad). Here’s a pitch related to the first note… Laura Palmer was secretly pregnant with a hot daughter who survived and is now grown up. Also attractive. Also gets murdered.
– The confrontation between Bobby and Chuck is so powerful and poignant, we thought we could split it into two mini-scenes to extend gratification. That was a note from Billions. We wanted you to see what it’s like to get a note when plot and character motivations were clear.
– Why is Ashley Judd in this for four seconds?
– Why is Jim Belushi in this for four seconds?
– It seems like many of the female characters are highly sexualized and often victims of trauma, abuse, or needless workplace harassment. Just a heads up about it being 2017, Bechdel test and all that.
Some suggested cuts:
– The insane slow and stop motions. Did you shoot those properly?
– All the Black Lodge scenes. On second thought, let’s just cut.
– The Log Lady. Doesn’t translate to 2017. Let’s keep her in 1990.
– David Lynch – the character who mocks the hearing impaired, not the filmmaker. Ha. Could you imagine if we said to cut the main creative voice behind the show?
Our thought would be to take a deep breath, watch some Billions, and imagine what it was like when we showed the dailies to the President of our network after blindly committing to 18 episodes.