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Oprah sat down Lance Armstrong this week for a revealing interview, in which the disgraced athlete admitted to using performance enhancing drugs throughout his storied career. it was just one of many revelations Armstrong came forth with:
- Never head a relationship with Sheryl Crow, but has been married to Lisa Loeb for going on 20 years
- Yeah, he may have been doping, but he's been riding a fixed-gear bike, which is "like way harder."
- Doesn't care for the Chinese
- Has never even been to France, let alone "toured it"
- Founded Livestrong "for the chicks"
- He's been jacked up on cocaine-infused Gatorade since '94
- Cringes every time he hears the Queen song "Bicycle Race." Not because of the subject matter. Just can't stand harmonizing.
- Once got busy in a Burger King bathroom
- Thinks of himself as a prankster, citing the times he regularly injected Floyd Landis and other teammates with HGH as a goof
- His regret is not the doping, but the cameo made in Dodgeball
- Was disappointed that Oprah had not hidden a "lifetime of peace with his decisions in life" underneath his seat
- Has never heard the word "bagel"
- Wears an extra pair of bicycle shorts underneath his main bicycle shorts in case anyone tries to pants him
- Believes steroids is "something you just get but can't really figure out where from. Like the flu or HPV."
- Thinks he got steroids from shaking Jose Canseco's hand in 1998
- Has to look up the word "Bicycle" every time he writes it to double-check he's spelling it correctly.
- Repeatedly referred to Buzz Aldrin as his "favorite spaceman"
- Claims to have invented the ukelele
- Known to bring live turtles to races, just to see if they beat him to the finish line
- Can only have sex if he's wearing a helmet
