13 Things Captain Picard Does While High

• Brings up Worf’s honor, like, way too much

• Accidently leaves replicator on, comes back to room full of butterscotch pudding

• Continually compares his high-grade weed to “the Nexus”

• Turns Ressikan Flute into bong

• Goes on a holodeck adventure to Laser Zeppelin

• Spends time with Q, really gets to know him

• Hangs up blacklight poster of U.S.S. Farragut

• Watches The Wizard of Oz while listening to Dark Side of the Moonwhile explaining it to Data

• Uses tractor beam to get salsa from fridge

• Tries to score drugs off Geordi La Forge

• Puts on that creepy mask from that shitty season 7 episode

• Builds ship in bottle, cries

• Guinan