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May 18, 2011

The Winklevoss twins are rolling over in their 65 mill.

Danish director Lars von Trier gave a shocking press conference for his new film Melancholia in which he admitted to being a Nazi and to understanding Hitler.

In future news, the movie Melancholia had the worst opening ever. It raked in less than Crossroads with Brittany Spears. Even Mel Gibson told Lars to tone it down a bit.


In some more pseudo anti-Semitic news, inspired by Facebook an Israeli couple named their daughter ‘Like’.

Can you imagine reprimanding Like? Do you use the middle name when you are really angry? Like Poke Konigsburg you get over here right now! The Winklevoss twins don’t like Like.

A retired prison guard from Wisconsin in the US has eaten his 25000th hamburger, 39 years to the day since he ate his first nine.

That’s 6410 burgers a year, 17 burgers a day. This guy’s blood type is special sauce. In homage to the Wisconsin native, Brett Farvre sent him a picture of his own meat.

In related news, an Egyptian princess who lived more than 3500 years ago is the oldest known person to have had clogged arteries, dispelling the myth that heart disease is a product of being a prison guard.