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December 29, 2009
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Internal Monologue Required Contest #3

9. I did it again! The fashion equivalent of plain bread! You're welcome!-trident
8. Let me tell you boys, they're fake.-drwho
7. Dude, I told you I could ante up, but, noooo, you wouldn't let me play that last hand.-Amy4Birds
6. Stacy Blonde: "I whitened my teeth! And my mouth feel fresh like I gargled Summer's Eve."
Eve Brunette: "I hate it when she's too perky. I'm gonna bitch slap her face like I bitch slap her minty vagina!-Rhiann0n
5. What did I tell you?? Doesn't she look just like I said?! Nothing, Kelly , just talkin' to the photographer. Don't act paranoid, dear."-trident
4. The only thing she knows how to fit is her lips around a...-drwho
3. “ Stacy can say whatever she wants. I shit on the hood of her car. ”-theDIRTYmidget
2. "Please send mellowpuma 9.99 via PayPal if you'd like to see my left hand 'wrist deep' in this hot babe..."-westsideslant
1. You didn't get a vest because I'm better than you.-trident

Best rant:
Yes, the material drapes in a way that hides what slight hips you may have. And your breasts are virtually invisible. And the jeans are snug, but not tight, so as to suggest curves without them being realized. And your boots are a stacked heel, practical not sexy. The toe is rounded with a slight contouring...again, practical not sexy. The fragrance is "Wednesday Nights" by Caldan Kline. The hairstyle leans heavily toward announcing, "I am a Female", without any of that messy "physical attraction" provocation. Now just give us a smile that says, "this is better than frowning", & walla! You are all ready to climb into your Ford Windstar & receive mild, passing glances at your son's soccer game.
-trident


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