or
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
This paper is dedicated to my female counterpatrs whom gave thier all for this research, , thank you so much for this earthshattering discovery and one of the best anartic expedittions this Man shall never forget!
3 Funny Votes
2 Die Votes
1,013 Views
Published June 10, 2012
I have applied for an LLC for mass producing Prophylactic's aka Condoms made from dead Penguin Hides,on a recent trip to anartic with 3 lovley female biologists, when we were caught ina an unpresidented 3 month hurricane force storm-72 mph winds constant blinding show. Supplied well by NSF aka national Science foundation,and in the NSF's storm proof large dome structure,reasonably warm 90% of time thanks to deep drilled natural gas wells that have supplied energy for many expeditions since early 20th century-alas on as many of at least over a dozen occasions the generators ,that we deemed the Gremlins constantly possesed units broke down. A supply of replacement parts was available and fixing the heating system was not a long process-but after each fix the generation heat units had to be reprimed and every time it took min of 12 hours for the Natural gas priming to take affect. So sarah/pamela/and Candace and Myself had to share naked body warmth to keep from freezing to death-now were scientists and in no way prudes and tottaly understand the act of intercourse for warmth and to pass the very long hours waiting during those times for our heat to come back,as to reassume our experiments,needless to say none could be done in below absolute zero tempetures. Now as stated before this unprecidented storm lasted 3 months and winters in anartic can and do last 9 months out of a 12 month year and to our dismay what Prophylactic's that were brought with us froze and cracked,making them useless, on our first hard freeze. Other forms of birthcontrol were not packed by my female scientist fellow counterparts,as thinking more on the many things that we were there to do any put into practice therorys of experiments to discover and benefit mankind. So By accidental circumstances beyond our control but opening up to us to put into practice and find a way to prevent pregnency-with our circumstances it wasn't tottaly a non issue that being stranded into even as long as a third trimester for any of my conterparts,so a hunt went on for a way to keep warm and entertained and keep pregnancy to a 100% non issue. IT was a unpresidented team effort that was taken to MAJOR teamwork which each of us took to Heart with much extremizum! Sarah has much knowlege in pollomurs and Pammy is a proficiant molding with hard forms using mixed substances and making them into malable useable materials, and Candace is/was the perfect,with narry a complaint as a most happy to oblige,over and over a testing subject! I as the man and had grown up in the deep south and hunted as a child took with much tepidation setting up snares baited with cold freeze dried salmom among many other things, set up only a few feet outside our Dome at the bottom of the world to try to catch, we hoped a Penguin,and not a walrus or seal,for thed break our snares easily. Within only 2.5 hrs.12 mins we had caught a small 1/2 kilo Penguin. With all our combined attributes we skinned and molded and dipped into a molecular pollomor and out of 1 tiny penguin produced over 100 Prophylactic/Condoms and proceeded on my part-Dr Ron Campbell- and Candy,,i mean Dr Candace to,,FOR SCIENCE, to use our PENGUIN PROPHYLACTIC'S. According to my fellow female professors the texture and possibly the fact that they had inside thier vaginas,not just 1 livepart of the male anatomy but also the skin of something that hours ago was also part of the chain of animalistic life chain inside the females most sensitive atomical exciting times of thier lives,. We can stop putting rubber condoms into our landfils and have these biodegradable Penguin Condom,Birthcontrol.
Advertisement
Advertisement

From Around the Web