Celebrities See All

Close

Quick Links

or
Published February 14, 2009 More Info »
0 Funny Votes
0 Die Votes
114 Views
Published February 14, 2009

Just Stimulate Me

Jim McPartland

www.funnyordie.com/jbmcpart

 

Barack, enough already. I’m listening to the radio and you’ll be on ‘Meet the Press’ today, explaining (and appealing) to the masses on why you’ll sign the Stimulus package.

This is overkill.

I voted for you. The majority of America was tired about how GWB2 drove us into the ground. I get it.

What you’re doing now is akin the explaining to messy children why they need to clean their rooms. You don’t have to keep holding family meetings with flip charts that show the advantages of picking up clothes. No matter what you say or do, there’s going to be a few that give you the advantages to having soiled undies under their beds. “Johnnie’s Mom lets him”. “It says it’s Ok in Genesis”. “Our illegal immigrant housekeeper needs the work”. Like a press conference, if you don’t say “that’s enough, discussion over” the objections will never stop.

At some point, you have to say “Look, I’m in charge. This is simply the fucking way it’s going to be. If you don’t like it, leave” (or win the next election).

That being said, should I be on the street corner with an axe pick in my hand waiting to dig up the street for $25/hr? How much training do you think I need to fill potholes? And I am mildly curious as to how having broadband internet service across the plains of Montana will help my neighbor buy a new car (a GM no less).

Christ—I’m starting to sound like one of the messy kids.

OK, forget the “what about me” syndrome. Just put through what you think will work. Just make it snappy. The undies are starting to breed fly larva.

 

“I’ve been workin’ on the railroad--- anyone know if i can Twitter out here?“

Advertisement
Advertisement

From Around the Web

More