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Stats & Data

August 09, 2009



I loathe weekends. Mainly because I get paid (NICE), but it goes right out the window (BOO). Anyway, I had to make my car payment today and after I made it, I look at my statement, only to discover this...

Hearing Impaired?

Now I'm sure you heard people often say "Why have a number to call if people can't hear?" or "Why have braille on a drive through ATM?". I only assume big Corporate America does this to cover their rich little asses. However, the little curious kitten that I am, I decided to call this number. I dialed it up expecting to be greeted with an automated voice answering system with the volume cranked to 11. Not the case, it just rang...and rang...and rang well over a minute. No pick up, no nothing. Just ringing. In this situation, I like to think of 3 scenarios.

A.) My loan company has a sense of humor and hired hearing impaired people to answer the hearing impaired phone line. (Imagine a room full of people staring blankly at their cubicle wall with phones ringing off the hook.)

2.) The number actually goes to a payphone located in the middle of no where.

III.) The person who does monitor the hearing impaired phone line was on the crapper, heard the phone rang, jumped up and in the process fell down and found a shiny new penny.

In all fairness, I did call at 9:00 a.m. EST. So perhaps the employee who mans that phone line wasn't at work yet, or running late, or spilled his coffee and was cleaning it up or something. So if you're bored, or drunk, or high or all three, give the number a call and leave a comment letting me know what happened. Would be interesting.

Written by: Stefan Hartman