You seen all of those great quizzes on Facebook that your friends take. Like what Friends character are you or what Elton John song are you or what number are you. Which by the way the answers for me are Gunther,Philadelphia Freedom and 58,7892. So now that I know that about myself let me help you out. You’re probably overwhelmed by which one you want to waste your time on first. Well no need to worry anymore! After you take this short quiz you will know which of those dumb quizzes you should take first! It’s easy. Every answer was a point value and at the end just add up your points to see which one you should do first.
You see it’s easy! So lets go cause your friends really need to see what movie title best fits your life! (My title is The Meteor Man)
O.J calls you to say how he really killed his wife. Do you…
(A) Call the police
(B) Just it go cause the statute of limitations got to up by now
© Throw out all of your Naked Guns VHS tapes
(D) Be a story topper and tell him you murdered your wife and kids
Your friend buys you Maroon 5 tickets for your birthday. You…
(A) You go cause it was a gift. But you know it’s going to suck
(B) You punch your so called friend in their face for giving you a shit gift
© You go to the show with a gun and kill Maroon 5
(D) You go to the show to kill yourself by listening to that ear cancer
Who is your favorite Pokemon?
(B) The flying rock one
© The Dude
(D) none of them besides Geodude of course
You just found out that God is real. You…
(A) Don’t care.
(B) ask him if he has any of that sweet water wine shit
© buy him a Coke Zero for him dying for your sins. That should make it even
(D) Thank him for aids,cancer and 9-11
You see a homeless man. You
(A) You ask him if he can break a $100 dollar bill cause that’s all you have
(B) Tell him you would help but you only help houseless people.
© Make fun of his “Will work for food sign”. What a dumbass you can’t buy a PS4 with beans
(D) Buy him some Subway and then watch him vomit
Your friend tells you that they have a drug problem. You….
(A) Help by buying them drugs.
(B) Tell them you had a drug problem for 4 seasons (Breaking Bad jokes)
© Ask them what’s the problem not enough drugs!? Then go for a high five
(D) Call them weak and say how no friend of yours would have a drug problem then leave them to die
What is your favorite planet?
(A) Earth….I mean that’s where I live and what other planet has $5 Hot-N-Ready pizza!?
(B) Mars. Robots live there!
© The Moon. Aka Earth’s Luigi
(D) Captain Planet. Besides him thinking love is a element he is a pretty smart dude
What’s the meaning of life?
(A) Don’t ask stupid questions
(B) Hold up let me watch The Matrix again
© I just looked it up. It says the existence of an individual human being or animal
(D) Oh the movie with Martin Lawrence? Something about them going to jail or some shit. Bernie Mac is in it
You called out of work. You will spend the day….
(A) in bed cause you’re really sick. You might have swine flu
(B) Watching Netflix cause someone got to watch all 275 episodes of Cheers
© Trying to remember why you thought doing 13 shots of vodka on Tuesday was a good idea
(D) Getting your alibi ready after a bomb goes off in your office killing everyone besides the one person that called out
You see a door that says “Do not open” but isn’t locked. You…..
(A) You go in cause you don’t listen The Doors cause they’re overrated
(B) You don’t go in but add the word please to the sign. I mean talk about rude
© You go in only to find dead inside (Walking Dead jokes)
(D) You don’t go in but find that homeless man from question 5 and make him do it
You’re on death row and you get to pick how you die. So you pick…..
(A) The Chair. But not that one the one George Strait made. I mean it’s fucking great!
(B) Firing squad. That’s how Jerry Maguire went out at the end of Valkyrie. You even get some sweet last words. “Show me the money!!!”
© Stoning. Anytime you have the chance to get killed by Geodude take it!
(D) Watching Lost.
You’re at the zoo. What animal do you want to see first?
(A) The one called exit
(B) Whatever one will give me back my $4.50 for this 12oz soda
© The apes. So I can killed them before they take over. Those damn things are so dirty as well
(D) YOU’RE MOTHER! Oh snap!
You hear about one of those mass school shootings on the news. You….
(A) Turn the channel cause you hate reruns
(B) Get off Facebook cause news feed is about to become the worst place on earth
© Blame it on Marilyn Manson
(D) NEWS!? You don’t have time for the news you just shot up a school!
You found out that your dad has cancer. You…
(A) Laugh. It’s the best medicine
(B) You yell at him for being a downer
© Ask him what else is new
(D) Don’t tell him. What he doesn’t know can’t hurt him
How many days a week do you go to the gym
(A) Everyday!….you did say Wendy’s right?
(B) Only when I want to see naked old dudes
(D) What’s a Jim?
You can go anywhere. Where do you go?
(A) St.Louis. Just to see how bad hell really is
(B) Florida. I always wanted to get away with murder
© Malaysia. Show them how to fly a plane
(D) Texas……….Just joking fuck that place
You could play basketball with anyone. Who do you pick?
(A) Yosemite Sam. He looked like the weak link on Tune Squad
(B) Stephen Hawking. I would space jam all in dat dude’s face! (#pun and that’s two Space Jam jokes in a row!)
© JFK. My crossover moves would blow his mind
(D) Barack Obama. He could use Obamacare to fix his broken ankles. Also if I lose I know who to blame…………..THANKS OBAMA!
What makes you sad?
(A) Death. I mean not enough people are dying
(B) Art. I can paint shapes as well why don’t I get paid?!
© Drew Carey. Why does he look like that now?
(D) Dexter’s new job. Is he a lumberjack now?
What do you think of The Rolling Stones?
(A) They’re dangerous!
(B) Not a big fan of them painting everything black
© Mick Jagger more like Mick Dagger! Cause I would like to kill him with one
(D) I’m more of a Time Magazine fan
What did you think of this quiz?
(A) It was the best thing ever made
(B) Man alive! Is it over?
© I gave up on it after question 4
(D) your mother is a whore
Ok! Add up your answers to see what quiz you should take first!
If you scored 40 points - 100 points:
THEN YOU’RE A ASSHOLE AND ALL OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS HATE YOU!
PLEASE LIKE MY FACEBOOK PAGE JOSHUA’S POINT OF VIEW: https://www.facebook.com/Joshpov?ref_type=bookmark
FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER @TODAJETS