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Published September 07, 2012

A relative of mine that will not be named hooked up with a MLS player. “He’s like, kind of famous,” she said. Soccer? In the U.S.A? Those guys can’t be counted as celebrities, can they?

We all noticed in the 2007 season when David Beckham showed up. Remember that? Water cooler conversation for a couple of days. Also, a way-too-easy Jeopardy! question that continues to appear on the show.

 

Turns out that MLS (Major League Soccer, since I know some of you don’t know that), also known as Futbol-Not-So-Americana, is growing here in the states.

Oh, and Canada, as Canada enjoys one of the fifteen teams in the MLS. It’s so sweet that we include Canada to have one team in the MLB and, as it turns out, MLS. We kindly allowed the Canadians to host one of the 256 regular season NFL games this year. Not bad considering half of football fans probably thought Buffalo was a suburb of Toronto anyway. Isn’t that what upstate New York means? Canada?

As it turns out, the MLS has made some major strides towards becoming a real league that people could maybe one day care about. One effort is that the MLS hired full time referees. I’m sure it was very difficult for this staff to say goodbye to their other jobs as gym teachers and boy scout leaders to become full time with the MLS at a salary that, I imagine, resembles that of the guy frothing your soy milk for a soccerballmacchiacto at the local trendy coffee shop.

Another action made by the MLS in 2007, before its 11th season to gain some Soccer cred was to make an MLS anthem. If you’re dying to hear this orchestral wonder of sound and spirit, enjoy here. This song is played before all regular season games. An even more advanced and super spectacular version of the anthem is played before the extra special finale known as the MLS Cup and the MLS All Star game, or match… cause it’s soccer. That’s right, there is an MLS All Star game played each year to pep rallys from 19,000 to 25,000 spectators. Oh, except for the first year in 1996 when tickets must have been free as the league “sold out” Giants Stadium to 78,416 people who were tricked into seeing game.

The most impressive feat is that the MLS has a banned substance policy. What’s the more interesting about such concept: that a soccer player with a 30-game hobby keeping him occupied from March until October feels the need to boost their performance with steroids or the fact that some of these players making about $30,000 or so think they can afford the aforementioned drugs?

Either way, I’d say that if you hook up with an MLS player it counts the same as hooking up with a reality show cast member… except one who actually has a job.

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