Alright, it’s 2015, so here is something we need to get straight. For starters, I think we can all agree: Everything on the ‘net is super cool right now. The GIFs are GIFin’ and the Vines are loopin’. But I’ve noticed one big gap in all the wonderful, intelligent, totally creative digi-content out there: Why isn’t anyone talking about the ‘90s?
Where are all the Seinfeld references nonsensically applied to things that they have no relationship to? Why isn’t some semi-clever Friends meme being shoehorned into topical conversations about politics?
Am I crazy? What’s going on here? Do people not want to be reminded of Boy Meets World apropos of nothing and in a way that contributes nothing to the discourse other than to make people go, “Oh yeah, I remember that.”
It just seems like a HUGE oversight. There’s a whole group of folks out there who grew up in the '90s (“'90s kids,” if you will) and who want nothing more than to experience empty, fleeting nostalgia over badly produced entertainment from the '90s.
If only there was some sort of mindless website that would just list a bunch of things that happened on The Fresh Prince of Bel Air so people could scroll through them and have the dim, dusty corners of their brains where this useless information is stored flicker, if only just for a moment.
And then there could be a parody website of that, and they could have their cake and eat it too by making fun of the first website but also referencing that same '90s nostalgia! But look out! Some other comedy outlet might then write an article taking 'em both down!
Anyway, all I’m saying is this just seems like a missed opportunity. Millions of dollars of advertising could be sluiced into people’s lizard brains on a wave of neon-colored ephemera from 1990 to 1999, without anyone having anything new to comment about it other than to point at it and say, “Look, this still exists.” People are already trained to click on anything with Mark Paul Gosselaar’s face on it like lobotomized lab rats trying to get food pellets. Cynical corporations could be basically printing money off the fact that people remember they sort of liked Rugrats and Full House!
And it could even expand to whole television programs that just name things from the '90s, eventually closing the nostalgia loop when these shows themselves are included in round-ups 30 years from now!
So, I’ll say it again: It’s just crazy there’s not one thing about the '90s on the web. The whole thing just makes me want to scream: