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Published: April 21, 2012
Description: Had to make a sign for work...took it too far.

At my former job one of the employees got her tampon string lit over the idea that no one was turning off the hall lights and asked me to make a sign, so I did. Then I made another one highlighting all those little tidbits that make my former job such a former stellar environment. The fact that I need a sarcasm font is not lost on me.


It would be appreciated if the last person in the building turns off the hall lights.

It would also be appreciated if:

The person who uses the last binder clip or pen puts more in the tray;

And if the person who jams the copier fixes it or uses the last bit of paper in the copier replaces it instead of moving to another copier;

And if the person who uses the last roll of toilet paper puts more in the bathroom instead of complaining to those who have plenty of it in theirs…because we’re not 12 years old;

And if the person who asks others to do the same thing over and over learns how to do it themselves;

And if the person who “can’t see in the dark” stops driving in it;

And if the person who keeps talking will stop when the person engaged in this conversational hostage situation has walked off;

And if the person who slings coffee grounds all over the kitchen and then walks in them would not do it anymore;

And if the person who runs out of coffee in the pot would stop talking to those who don’t care that it happened;

And if those who clip their nails at work would stop because someone is going to lose an eye;

And if those who leave food in the refrigerator far past the date of intended consumption would learn what the rest of us already know…that is doesn’t just disappear;