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Stats & Data

January 31, 2017

Out of 1.6 billion Muslims, there's gotta be a few good, American-loving eggs!

Does this woman look familiar?



Not ringing any bells? Look closer…


*scratches head*

Stumped? Well, here’s a hint: she’s actually not a woman at all. She’s a very big statue.


Talk about putting a lady on a pedestal!

Her name is ‘The Statue of Liberty.” And ever since this country was discovered in 1776, she has welcomed the people of the world to America’s shores. Maybe you’ve even heard her famous catchphrase?

“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free…”

Sounds nice, right?

Yeah, like a “nice” way to get yourself blown to hell! Who knows what’s in the middle of that “huddled mass?”


Everyone eagerly awaiting their arrival in the land of opportunity = very suspicious…

It could be a child orphaned by the conflict in Syria…



Or it could be ISIS!



Thankfully, President Trump decided that until his administration can properly determine the many, multi-faceted threats that scared and desperate families pose to this country, he will temporarily bar all refugees, indefinitely suspended the entry of all Syrian refugees, and block visits from the citizens of Iran, Iraq, Libya, Somalia, Sudan, Syria and Yemen…

Unless they’re wearing a throwback Troy Aikman Dallas Cowboys jersey!


Want to make “America Great?” Only let ‘em in if they’re wearing \#8!

You see, the executive order that President Trump signed last week stated that the USA“must ensure that those admitted to this country do not bear hostile attitudes toward our country and its founding principles.”

And while some “refugees” will try and prove that they love this country by paying lip service to ideas like “freedom” and “equality,” how can President Trump know that they really mean it when they look nothing like him and can’t even name their favorite character from NCIS?


Ours is Abby. Obvi.

There are a handful of cucks who saying that this executive order is just a “backdoor” Muslim ban, but that’s FAKE NEWS! President Trump knows that out of the 1.6 billion Muslims on earth, there are a few good eggs. They’re real easy to spot, because they’re the ones wearing Jeff Gordon ball caps!


Rainbow Warriors welcome!

Libtards don’t like to admit it, but these refugees come from countries NEXT TO other countries where SOME terrorists have come from. The only way we can know for sure that they’re not gonna go all jihad on us is if they can rap the entire “Fresh Prince” theme song.


Any true 90s kid would totally be let in as a refugee.

The snowflakes have already taken to Twitter to say that just because people come from different countries, have different colors of skin, speak different languages, or worship differently doesn’t mean that mean that they don’t share our same core values.


Pssh. Put down the doobie, hippies.


Here’s a quick tip: if someone doesn’t look like you, they probably want to kill you. But if someone knows all of the cool lines from “The Matrix,” then this land is your land, friend!


“Pick a pill. Any pill.”

So, you can give that “Torch Arm” a break, Lady Liberty because President Trump is putting the lid back on this “melting pot.” We like this freedom soup the way it is!