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November 30, 2015
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Kobe recently told his fans via poem that he is retiring. This is the poem he wrote to let his haters know.

Kobe Bryant recently told his fans via poem that he will retire from the NBA at the end of this season. He wrote another poem for all of his haters, which you can read below.


DEAR BASKETBALL (HATERS)
by Kobe Bryant

Dear Basketball,
Cover your leather ears,
Because you shouldn’t hear
The words I’m about to shower
Upon all my doubters.

Who are my haters, you ask, sweet ball?
Well, some are midgets, others, too tall.
Some are less rich than me,
and most are real poor -
My haters are every single human being alive,
Not a few, but all.

Not just people, either,
but animals, dogs, and ghosts;
Nothing existing ever thought
I’d make threes on both coasts
Or hit a buzz shot.

To those who have booed me,
Both ball fans and ghouls,
My skills left you speechless,
My sweet plays made you fools.

To MJ, yes, you Michael,
You’ve always made me laugh.
With your tiny ‘stache, little ring,
And store for art crafts.

To Magic and Kareem,
I’m the best Laker of all time.
And though I’ve been accused,
I was found innocent of sex crimes.

To LeBron James,
I’m sorry we never met.
Even if we did at some point,
You’re easy to forget.

To the scientists who failed me,
Tried to fix my bod but could not -
We shan’t speak again,
Until you can upload my mind
Into a b-ball robot.

To the dog on my street,
Who barks at my car -
Where’s your shoe deal,
And were you an All Star?

To the sharks in the ocean,
Hunting those fish -
You’ll never know the sound
of a basketball swish.

To those who think I suck now
Yes, that may be true,
But I’m a living piece of art,
So even my failure is cool.

And even though the Devil
May reclaim my soul soon,
Nothing’s gonna stop me
From shooting bricks at the moon.

Because there’s only one “Kobe Stopper,”
His name’s Father Time,
And he has my respect.
But if he ever talks shit,
A harsh poem from me,
he can surely expect.

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