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February 29, 2016
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The Republican presidential candidates love to insult each other — but are they truthful?

In the lead up to Super Tuesday, the Republican candidates are hurling rapid-fire insults at their competition. Donald Trump said that Marco Rubio is a “little boy,” while Rubio accused Trump of having small hands. But are these insults true? Does Trump have tiny hands? Is Rubio a little boy? We fact checked every Republican insult to see which candidates tell the truth.


Marco Rubio Said Trump Has Small Hands

At a campaign event this Sunday, Rubio said of Trump “You know what they say about men with small hands? You can’t trust them.“ A bruising insult about Trump’s masculinity to be sure, but is it true? Yes and no. After combing through hundreds of photos of Trump’s hands, what’s clear is that he actually has normal-sized hands, but with tiny little fingers attached to them. This phenomenon has been well-documented, and Rubio was correct to bring up that Trump’s appendages don’t live up to expectations, even if he didn’t get the details exactly right. We rate this insult:

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Trump Called Rubio A Little Boy

Trump has taken to referring to Rubio as “Little Marco” on Twitter, and has even called him a little boy. But is Marco Rubio a little boy? Not exactly. At 5’10”, he’s the shortest of the current candidates. And he has worn high-heeled cowboy boots at many events in order to appear taller. Plus, he’s just sort of small looking, you know? But a boy he is not. He is 44 years of age, and according the law, a boy is a male who is under 18, at best. So sorry, Donald, while Rubio is little, he certainly isn’t a boy. We rate this insult:

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Trump Said Cruz Is A Soft Little Baby

At a rally, Trump stated that Ted Cruz is “like a little baby: soft, weak, little baby.” Grammar aside, is Ted Cruz a soft little baby? Partially. Again, Trump’s people need to go over age guidelines with him because a baby is a human older than three months who hasn’t yet learned how to walk. Ted Cruz knows how to walk. But Trump is correct on the fact that something about Cruz reminds one of a big baby, perhaps the very soft, doughy way his face looks. We rate this insult:

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Cruz Said Donald Trump Is Fat Bastard

After Trump’s baby insult, Cruz tweeted a video of the Austin Powers 3 character Fat Bastard. He wrote that Trump, “calls me a ‘soft weak little baby.’ Hope he doesn’t try to eat me!” followed by a link to the clip. So is Donald Trump Fat Bastard? Clearly not. In the credits of Austin Powers 3, Fat Bastard is credited as Canadian actor Mike Meyers. However, there is an eerie similarity between Trump and Fat Bastard’s skin tone, but that’s where the resemblance stops, Senator Cruz. We rate this insult:

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Trump Called Rubio A Lightweight

Trump called Rubio a “lightweight” on Twitter. But is there evidence that Rubio can’t hold his liquor? Yes. When asked if he could get a beer with someone who would it be, Rubio suggested Malala- an underage Muslim. She’s certainly not going to drink- Rubio was probably angling for someone who wouldn’t embarrass him by showing him up in a drinking contest. Also, he’s known for needing to drinking gallons of water during speeches and debates. Anyone who needs to be that hydrated isn’t great at drinking. So yes, Trump was definitely correct. We rate this insult:

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Rubio Said Trump Sells Tacky Ties

On the campaign trail, Rubio called Trump’s clothing line, “those tacky ties.” Was Rubio right in saying that? We looked through Trump’s entire collection, and while those ties are many things like “bold,” “look like my dad would like them,” and “overpriced,” they aren’t tacky. A tie with the logo of your favorite football team is tacky, these just aren’t very stylish. Sorry Marco. We rate this insult:

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Rubio Accused Trump Of Peeing His Pants

At a rally in Dallas, Rubio said that Trump requested a full length mirror, “maybe to make sure his pants weren’t wet.” But is it true? Has Donald Trump ever wet his pants? We found pictures of him as a child, so he has ostensibly worn diapers before, so yes, he has wet his pants. It’s actually amazing that more candidates don’t accuse each other of having peed their pants- it’s an airtight insult. We rate this insult:

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Rubio Accused Trump Of Having A Spray Tan

In Huntsville at a rally, Rubio stated that Trump has a “horrible spray tan.” You only need a pair of working eyes to fact check this one. Well done Rubio! We rate this insult:

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Trump Called Cruz A Pussy

During a speech, Trump repeated what an audience member said stating that Cruz is a pussy. Is Ted Cruz a pussy? Absolutely not. Women’s vaginas are amazing, beautiful parts of the human anatomy. Ted Cruz is none of those things. We rate this insult:

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Rubio Said Trump Rides Around On
“Hair Force One”

Rubio stated that Trump “rides around on Hair Force One.” This is the most pandering, incorrect insult of the bunch. First of all, an obvious fact check of Trump’s jets show that he owns no such plane. Furthermore, it would be awesome if he had named one of his planes Hair Force One. Major fail, Rubio. We rate this insult:

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