- Your list of upcoming movie rentals will now be stored in your 'Qwewe.'
- The Qwikster logo will be replaced by a less subtle image of an actual vagina.
- Netflix will announce the creation of yet another branch - 'Walkster,' which will involve a user physically traveling to their nearest Walkster location and manually renting a DVD.
- The American classic 'Casablanca' will soon join Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog and Dunston Checks In as movies available for live streaming.
- The mysterious light in the Qwikster logo will be revealed to be an incandescent light bulb hovering over the head of a man in a straitjacket.
- An email will be sent from CEO Reed Hastings apologizing for his 'unnerving, continuous string of abhorrent corporate revisions.' He will also refer to himself as 'humbled' and 'a twit.'
- Qwikster will replace the small, convenient Netflix return envelopes with 13.25" x 11.5" x 2.38" return boxes in order to differentiate themselves from their sister company. Returned discs may be padded with the wadded up pieces of paper provided, which contain a host of rejected ideas for the new company name.
- Qwikster will offer several never before available titles, including Dubbal Indehmnutee, Gawn Wid tha Winned, and Tha Filladillfeea Stoaree.
- You will conveniently be able to create your movie list on one website, watch it on another, pay for it on a third, contact someone to complain on a fourth, and email your cancellation request on a fifth.
- Netflix will start streaming porn. FINALLY.