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March 06, 2009


well this is my first "real" blog, whereupon i expound upon [sic] the topics of the day. i wrote it right after my "introductory" blog because the topic was fresh in my mind and i didn't want to lose it. that's the problem with blogging: i have like 5000 ideas for blogs, but if you don't write them down right away, you might lose them.  i might just have to keep on typing them out, which will probably take about a month, but at least i'll have blogs for like a whole year.

my first topic is called "unemployment: pros and cons". i can speak from a position of authority because, yes, i am actually unemployed right now. well, we all know the pros of being unemployed so i won't go into that. the cons, however,  are myriad and varied, the main one being the "no money" thing. this is why i've decided to put my "sweet ass" on the street.

the famous "jack white" of the equally famous rock band "the white stripes" once famously said, "you can't be a pimp and a prostitute, too". well i'm here to say that this veiled jab at american hypocricy is off the mark. i really think that i can make a go of it. i mean, i already hold the dual roles of "blogmaster and "blogger" (or "blogservant"), so i think i can handle this one. i can wear many hats, if just given the chance. many, many hats.

so it's actually pretty simple (i've already done the research). you can get a vendor's licence from your state for like $25 (depending on your particular state legislation). then you get an llc (limited liability company) application (because you want to protect yourself and your new "company")  off of the "internet".  it's about $200. now you can set up shop. just put "personal pleasure provider" under occupation. you file your taxes quarterly with the 1040C form from the IRS, which i believe that you can pick up at any public library (i would consult with an accountant on this one- h&r block is very reasonable). now you can start raking in the cash! the beauty of this whole thing is that YOU ARE YOUR OWN BOSS! you are the "owner" AND the "employee"! heck, you can pay your "employee" anything you want, and you're still making fat dimes (or rolls, what have you)! i mean, there's no shortage of cheap labor out there. after all you ARE the cheap labor, too!  think about it- no living in fear, no nasty beat downs, no lying ass bitches. you'd only be beating down YOURSELF. you are THE LYING ASS BITCH! see how brilliant it is?

so i say to you, famous "jack white": you are a lovely, brilliant and talented man. but i am here to prove you wrong. you CAN be a pimp and a prostitute, too.

i'll keep you updated on how it's going.

keep on bloggin'!