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January 25, 2010
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Those Were Different Times Contest #2
Brought to you by The Success Motivation Institute Inc. it's Elmer Wheeler's AWARD WINNING TALK "Selling The Sizzle".
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11. Even for the album cover photo shoot, Elmer couldn't keep his eye off of Mrs. Clark's tits.
-ideeclare
10. Featuring the Number one hit "Hot Beef Injections".
-WiscoDick
9. Ironically, Elmer invested his royalties in the Ponderosa Steak House company, and upon their bankruptcy, proved that he could sell the sizzle, but not the steak itself.
-ideeclare
8. It’s all in the Clip-On.
-theDIRTYmidget
7. It's been a law in Florida since 1997 that if you're having a yard sale you must be selling, among other things: a crock pot, jack stands (car ramps will do) and at least one Elmer Wheeler album.
-MadAdam
6. I must have this award winning "talk"! I have so much goddamn sizzle just gathering dust around here, maybe I could sell it on ebay?!
-cymonz
5. Before this, people ate their bacon raw.
-keibar
4. Tony Robbins was conceived to this album.
-snyetha
3. "Don't eat the penis, it's just a garnish."
-trident
2. If you can sell a 6 pound sirloin covered with slices of salami and provolone cheese, you can sell anything.
-MadAdam

1. y'know, record executives catch a lot of flack for interfering with the sensibilities of artists, but the notes for "Selling the Wavy Lines" were spot-on
-trident






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