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Published July 04, 2008

The other day I saw the bad-ass flick, that is cleverly titled: ‘The Incredible Hulk’. As I watching the film, it raised many scientific and philosophical questions, namely in the field of Body Hair. Though the film only touched on the topic very briefly, I felt that it is a topic of great interest that should be further explored. Right now…

Now we all know that Bruce Banner is an average-sized, white male, with dark hair; but when he transforms into The Hulk he becomes a giant, green monster, with green hair. But now what about the rest of the hair on Banner’s body?  That’s the real question. If Bruce Banner grows out a beard does that mean The Hulk has a beard?

Both movies ended with Bruce Banner sporting a nice beard, but he never gets to transform back into The Hulk before the film ends. And why do you think that is?! Because Hollywood is not ready to tackle the big issues! Hollywood can’t answer the question of whether or not The Hulk would have a beard because it would open Pandora’s Box!

If we knew whether or not The Hulk grew a beard, it would raise too many other questions, like: Does The Hulk have pubes? What color would they be? Are they larger than Bruce Banner’s regular pubes? If The Hulk’s pubes are larger, is his wiener larger? Does The Hulk even have a wiener? Does Bruce Banner even have a wiener? Does The Hulk have a green wiener? Does Bruce Banner have a green wiener? Why do I have a green wiener? Is it common among guys? Should I consult some sort of doctor about this?

…..you see……it just raises too many questions….

 

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