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Published August 22, 2010

Those Were Different Times Contest #78

That last contest was a bit of a sausage fest, so ... with special courtesy paid to the proud employees of Cabot Valves, without further ado may I introduce:
"MUSIC TO SELL VALVES BY"
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And the Best Dramatic Monologue Which Includes The Term Ejaculation Award goes to:
My Goodness!!! What a deal! I thought I was just buying a sturdy cardboard sleeve with a mildly amusing photograph on it of an attractive young woman wearing novelty pins bearing colorful phrases and puns about valves. That would've been PLENTY, but, as it turns out, I also get a FREE 33 rpm Long Play Stereo Record Album! And with MUSIC on it, yet! Musi... more »
-theDIRTYmidget

4. Inside where?
-drwho

3. Unfortunately, after three hours she felt too deflated to sell
-buttermilk

3.25. "Valves, valves or valves. Nobody valves for valves."
( A humble tribute to trident. xo?. )

3. From the people who brought you "MUSIC TO SORT, INVENTORY AND RESTOCK MECHANICAL-PENCILS BY".
-theDIRTYmidget

2.5. My Other Valve Is A Valve!

2.25. I ? Your Valve, Can I Pressurize It?

2. An Angel Has Its Genitals Mutilated Every Time You Blow A Valve Sale
-trident

1.75. She doesn't like talking about her flair, but she does like fucking HVAC repairmen

1. Nice try, but I didn't buy it when it was the Deep Throat Soundrack and I'm not buying it now
-missalicia


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