Full Credits

Stats & Data

0Funny
0Die
182
Views
May 13, 2010
Published
Description

-

Those Were Different Times Contest #53

Introducing the JACK EMBLOW SEXTET  and their submittal to the annals of musical recording: 
 "HOUSEWIVES' PLAYTIME"
--------------------------------
Look below the picture for a list of song titles from trident that are very good.

7. 'Jack Emblow Sextet'? REALLY!?!
-spase

6. She lives in that cabinet. Now that she's done the housework she gets her reward of bread and water before going back in. She's a lucky, lucky lady.
-Kristi51

5. That ain't no housewife! Heels? Fuck that! Broom stick? Not anywhere near a dust bunny (or anal cavity, where she prefers it) and what the HELL!? Every housewife worth her ounce in lovingly home-made potato salad will tell you that all the HOT action is in unbalanced laundry loads...one towel for all the undies in the house.
-csymonz

4. Wanda knew the vibrating bass from the radio would mop those blues away.
-gerhardguffaw

3. "Ya! I'll trade this cup o' coffee for the right to vote, you betcha!"
-trident (see below picture for a list to end all lists)

2.5. Since she discovered the deep bass of the Hi-Fi, she won’t leave it even to take nourishment.
2. The bucket is for her post-beating tears.
-theDIRTYmidget

1. Mom and broom were so happy then, before that son of a bitch Swiffer came into the picture.
-missalicia


Trident's list of lists:
Re-Issue Includes Never-Before-Released Classics Like:
"Now Don't Cha Get All Fat On Me"
"You Don't Have To Work All Day Like Me, So Shut Up"
*"I Specifically Told You Stiletto Heels With Peep Toe On Tuesdays (When Did You Stop Understanding English)"
"My Boss Is Coming Over For Dinner, So Clean Yourself Up"
*"If I Catch You Talking To The Neighbors Again, I'll Tell Your Mother That You Touched Yourself In The Kitchen"
"You're Lucky I Let You Live Here"
"If My Secretary Calls, Tell Her I'm Gonna Have Great Sex With Her On My Desk

Also:
*"Another Terse Dinner With The Vague Threat Of Physical Violence (The Scrapey-Fork Song)"
"Don't Forget To Clean My Vacuum When You're Done With It"
*"If You Get Pregnant, You Know What To Do""Shut Up"
*"Didn't I Tell You To Shut Up? (Reprise)"
"Why Does My Toothbrush Smell Like Ass Juice?"
*"Why Does My Man Masturbate In The Basement All Night?"
*"Never In The Face (The Bruise Song)"

Y:
"You Missed A Spot"
"Take Off All Your Clothes & Dance"
"Tell Your Mother To Shut Up"
*"Where's My Favorite Tie? (Blaming The Dry Cleaners Won't Save You)"
"I Used To Think I Loved You, But It's Really Just Been Deep-Seated Hatred All Along (Featuring 'Danny Boy' Jameson On Drums)"
*"I Can Tell When You're Lying"
*"Does Harry's Market Sell Anything Besides Pot Roast, For Cryin' Out Loud"
"I'll Come Home When You Don't Have Your Period, Whenever That Is"
"I Smell Like A Lot Of Vaginas Because I Had To Work Late At The Office, And There's A Uh Vagina Factory That Just Opened Up Across The Street"

*thoroughly approved

Advertisement
Advertisement