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March 06, 2009


(from my blog at whatgives.gainesville.com)

Talk about multitasking. An Ohio woman was recently cited for breast-feeding a child and chatting away on a cell phone while DRIVING.

How many hands does this woman have?

A motorist reported the lady to police. Wouldn’t you have loved to have been a fly on that guy’s windshield when he saw what was going on?

This is what I imagine the call to police was like:

MOTORIST: “Hello. Uh. I just saw a lady driving ... breasts ... cell phone.”

POLICE: “Excuse me sir?”

MOTORIST: “Boobage.”

POLICE: “If this is some kind of sick prank call I’m going to be very unhappy sir.”

MOTORIST: “What! No. I saw a lady breast-feeding her child.”

POLICE: “That’s not a crime sir.”

MOTORIST: “She was driving and breast-feeding. It was a BWD.”

POLICE: “A what?”

MOTORIST: “Breast-feeding while driving! Get with the program. Don’t you guys have names like that for crimes?”

POLICE: “Not for that one sir. And you mentioned something about a cell phone.”

MOTORIST: “Yes, breasts. I mean ... er ... yes, she was on a cell phone.”

POLICE: “Breast-feeding and talking on a cell phone while driving? That’s a new one.”

Well, they were able to track the woman down and her explanation was that she wasn’t going to let her child go hungry, The Associated Press reported.

Her tot possibly dying in a collision apparently wasn’t a big concern. But hunger? Not on her watch!