On the Fourth
On the Four of July, let us not forget what it was all about. What the revolution was all about. Independence form England. Our Founding Fathers Risked their freedom, fortunes, and lives for the following.
The right to:
1. Drive on the right side of the road from the left seat!
2. Say aluminum not Al-lU-MIN-E-um.
3. Ice Cold Beer.
4. Not give a damn about the Royal Family and their weddings, babies, and so on.
5. Say schedule not Shed-u-al!
6. Food that tastes Good!
7. Care less about soccer.
And most Importantly
8. NOT PRONOUNCE THE T IN OFTEN!!
SO STOP DOING IT YOU LOYALIST SCUM! Every time someone says "ofTen" it is an affront to our revolutionary principles. Come on do you pronounce the K in knife or the E even, "KnifE" That's it I'm making a revolutionary call to every Patriot. When someone pronounces the T in often counter it by pronouncing every silent letter! Or go old school and tar and feather them.
Enjoy the 4th everyone and Down the British!