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42Funny
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1,145
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March 17, 2015
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Not in a stupid Upworthy way.

Listen. This is not some Upworthy shit. I’m not trying to trick you into watching it.

I cried because:

1. I am still a little bit intoxicated.

2. Jesus Christ, this is the worst.

This is not a video about some touching shit like a deaf baby hearing for the first time or whatever. It is about a lady who just wanted to work hard and manage a business, and she caught her TRUSTED ASSOCIATE of FOURTEEN YEARS jizzing in her coffee, and she realized in retrospect it was not the first time.

This poor lady! I don’t care if she was a hardass of a boss, which I imagine was his mental justification. NO ONE deserves to unknowingly drink jizz. No one. And it turns out it’s not even a sex crime to trick someone into unknowingly drinking your jizz! God, I am just so sad for her. It is hard enough for a woman in the workplace without worrying that your morning coffee is a jizzaccino. This is why we need feminism, you guys.

None of my FoD coworkers would ever do anything like this. If they did I would straight up end them. I’m crying a little again, because of this video and also because my sisters live so far away. I want to go home and take a nap.

I guess the video’s not working. Here’s a link. Honestly though instead of watching it just recommit yourself to not jizzing in people’s coffee.

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