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May 25, 2015
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Members of the House of Representatives introduced a new bill this week that would require the removal of Andrew Jackson on the American $20 bill to be replaced with a bad bitch.

WASHINGTON—Arguing that the measure would help Republicans to not feel gay while they jack off to stacks of money, The White House is putting to vote legislation to where a woman would be put on the $20 bill.

Members of the House of Representatives introduced a new bill this week that would require the removal of Andrew Jackson on the American $20 bill to be replaced with a bad bitch. Pornstar and punching bag Christy Mack comes to mind when people talk about who. But no one lady has really been decided.

“We don’t want to put her on the $100 bill or anything serious, but it’d be nice to feel less gay when I jack off to my money” says Republican House Leader John Boehner.
“Once they see the actual eyes and ears and other features of the bill, I believe they’ll rethink what they’re about to do.” In response to backlash from women’s rights groups, the bill’s sponsors said that if women don’t want to view the images, they are free to close their eyes or just look away.

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