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Published July 14, 2008 More Info »
62 Funny Votes
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Published July 14, 2008

Dear Daniel,
Hey, how’s it going?  How’s soccer?  I know practice is a drag, but you got to keep with it, buddy.  How’s Billy?  He’s a real cool friend, keep him around.  I feel like it’s been forever since we’ve talked.  Happy belated 7th birthday by the way!  I’m so sorry I missed it.  I wanted to be there, but your older sister and I aren’t really “seeing each other” right now.  I want you to know that will not affect our relationship.  You and I can still be buddies.

Let’s catch up soon, let me know when the next family dinner is!

Talk to you soon,
Nick

Ps.  I don’t have any stamps, so I’m just going drop this in the mail slot on your front door.

TWO WEEKS LATER

Dear Daniel,

Hey, never heard back from you!  You’re probably really busy with baseball right now.  I read somewhere you guys won 2 games last week, Congrats!

Have there been any other guys around the house?  Other guys my age?  Or maybe older?  If so, are they shorter than me?  You don’t happen to know any of their full names or addresses do you?

What else is going on?  Are you still doing all those cool drawings?  Have you noticed your sister talking on her cell phone a lot?  Isn’t her phone cool?  I’ve been thinking about getting the same kind of cell phone she has. Maybe you could tell me all the recent numbers in her call list.  I’m just curious how many numbers those phones can hold. Let’s just keep this on a “need to know” basis.  Your mom, dad, and sister don’t need to know. You can tell Billy. He might be useful as a look-out.

Keep up the good work in baseball!!! Remember: choke up and don’t drop your right shoulder. If you get a chance, I’d love to see your team’s schedule. Oh, and let me know if any coaching positions open up.

See you soon,
Nick

ONE WEEK LATER

Dear Billy,
What’s up with your friend Daniel? He won’t write me back.

Stay cool,
Nick

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